A fan's viewpoint on the Mini-McMahon....

My good friend Jinsei (Jesse) has an interesting take on how he would have gone with the McMahon bastard son angle. Instead of trying to describe it, here it is.

I have some quirks with WWE right now. I can't help but feel rather... annoyed, disgust, completely stupified at what happened on RAW last night. The moment they said "things are looking up" I thought of "Hornswaggle." Though, I shrugged that aside claiming that the WWE couldn't be that stupid at blowing up a huge chance to build the next big star.
Damn... was I wrong.

For the first time in 10 years, I truly feel as though WWE has lost its touch. Yes, there are guys like Londrick, WGTT, Rey Rey, and Mr. Kennedy there who'll make matches exciting to watch.. but I can't help but feel absolutely betrayed at a such a CRAPPY outcome of a storyline.
Even if Mr. Kennedy was "disqualified" for his little personal demons, there was still an entire lockerroom of possibilities. If I recall correctly, you said in your column that you would like to read how the fans would have done it.. or something to that effect.

Let's look at the roster. (As of 9-11-2007)
John Cena, Cody Rhodes, Sandman, Jim Duggan, Val Venis, Bobby Lashley, Triple H, Jeff Hardy, Paul London, Brian Kendrick, the Highlanders, Super Crazy, Shawn Michaels, Mr. Kennedy, Carlito, Charlie Haas, Shelton Benjamin, Snitsky, Daivari, Regal, Orton, Umaga, Morella, Murdoch, Cade
Batista, Ric Flair, Mysterio, Jimmy Wang-Yang, Shannon Moore, Sho Funaki, Undertaker, Matt Hardy, Kane, Chuck Palumbo, Jesse, Festus, Great Khali, Mark Henry, Chavo Guerrero, Jamie Noble, Hornswaggle, Kenny Dykstra, Deuce, Domino, Hardcore Holly, Greg Helms, Fit Finlay, MVP, Chris Masters
Tommy Dreamer, Balls Mahoney, Nunzio, CM Punk, Steven Richards, Boogeyman, John Morrison, Big Daddy V, Kevin Thorn, The Miz, Mike Knox, Marcus Cor Von, Elijah Burke, Matt Striker

Ok, a pretty large roster, even if it's just the males. Let's take a look at genetics. Vince McMahon is a caucasian, so his offspring would have caucasian in him. This immediately eliminates the performers whom have absolutely zero possibilities of being caucasian (or any mix) with Caucasian.
This eliminates: Bobby Lashley, Sho Funaki, Great Khali, Shelton Benjamin, Marcus Cor Von, Mark Henry, Big Daddy V, Elijah Burke, Boogeyman, MVP and Rey Mysterio.

Now let's take out the obvious performers who've been suspended, thus, their chances of being a "McMahon" are immediately taken away.
This eliminates: Mr. Kennedy, John Morrison, Charlie Haas, Umaga, Regal, and Santino Marella. (From what I know, heard.)

Of course, during the course of time, each performer gives some insight of their lives. These insights show the superstars with their parents. So now, let's eliminate the performers who've already had their parents shown and set in stone.
This eliminates: Randy Orton, Chavo Guerrero, John Cena, Carlito, Cody Rhodes, Undertaker, Kane, and Shawn Michaels.

Let's not ignore the age issue. Vince is old, but there are quite a few performers in WWE whom are much too old to be his son.
This eliminates: Ric Flair, Jim Duggan, Batista, and Fit Finlay.

Now let's take out the possibilities of the obvious performers that Vince McMahon would NEVER associate himself with. This automattically removes all ECW originals as well as others for one reason or another.
This eliminates: Sandman, Jimmy Wang-Yang, Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Paul London, Brian Kendrick, the Highlanders, Super Crazy, Daivari, Murdoch, Shannon Moore, Tommy Dreamer, Matt Hardy, Nunzio, CM Punk, Steven Richards, Jamie Noble, Greg Helms, Val Venis, Deuce, Domino, Mike Knox, Jesse, and Festus

That took a huge chunk of the roster out from the list. Now let's see who's all left.
Triple H, Lance Cade, Snitsky, Chuck Palumbo, Hornswaggle, Kenny Dykstra, Hardocre Holly, Chris Masters, Kevin Thorn, The Miz, Matt Striker

With this small list, I can say that there are quite a few worthy performers to take this spot. Triple H is already a huge star and doesn't need this spotlight. Hardcore Holly is incredibley injured, last I heard. Kevin Thorn doesn't need this push, given his gimmick.
I think that the best three choices for who's left on the list are Kenny Dykstra, Snitsky, and Chuck Palumbo. Vince has always expressed a likings to Dykstra, but claims that there was nothing for him (thus missing a huge chance). Snitsky, given his brutal, violent past, could easily use this "abandonment issue" to push him as a top, monster face against a jealous Triple H. Chuck Palumbo needs something to give him an edge before he flounders as just a generic biker.

~~~~~~~~

Personally, I think this was all set up by Triple H. While it could have been Mr. Kennedy, once he was caught with the drug testings, Triple H jumped to a chance. Trips doens't want his top spot taken from him. He remembered the power an in-story-line McMahon could have and doesn't want this new "McMahon" to become the next top star. He doesn't want his spot to be taken by any other performer. So to protect his spot, he threw out the "funny" suggestion of having Hornswaggle as a McMahon.
Other than cheap, unfunny-funny crap, this will amount to nothing.

I think it's awfully creative. What do you think?